The Comparison Game

The Dangers of the Comparison Game in Christianity.

As a lifelong Red Sox fan, I can tell you the past 21 years have been much sweeter than the 86 years prior. In that 86-year period, we as Sox fans, experienced plenty of heartbreaking moments on the field.

But we also suffered from an overwhelming, defeating external focus on what other teams were doing, instead of focusing on what the Red Sox were doing. Those other teams—namely, the Yankees—became our focus, so much so that even when the Sox did something amazing, we immediately shifted our attention to what the Yankees’ response would be. And more often than not, the Yankees would do, at least in the minds of Red Sox fans, something bigger and better.

And just like that, the amazing thing the Red Sox did wasn’t enough.

That story reminds us that the comparison game can be sneaky. One minute you are unabashedly following Jesus. The next minute you are checking to see how everyone else is following Him.

Peter did the exact same thing. Right after being restored by Jesus, he turned, pointed at John, and basically asked, “Okay, but what about him?”

Jesus responded with the line that still pierces through every comparison-driven thought:

“What’s it to you? You follow Me.”

Let’s look at why those words matter today.

1. Restoration Was Personal, Not Public

After denying Jesus three times (Matthew 26:69–75), Peter receives a one-on-one moment with the resurrected Christ in John 21:15–19. Jesus does not lecture Peter or hand him a failing spiritual scorecard. He restores Peter with tenderness, clarity, and purpose.

In Psalm 103, we see the promise of God to supernaturally restore and forgive:

“He does not deal with us according to our sins, nor repay us according to our iniquities. For as high as the heavens are above the earth, so great is his steadfast love toward those who fear him; as far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions from us.” — Psalm 103:10–12

I am sure Peter was haunted by his prior denial, but Jesus restores us individually and fully, despite our shortcomings.

2. Comparison Shows Up at the Worst Possible Time

You would think, after being forgiven, by the risen Lord, Peter would be floating in gratitude. Instead, as soon as Jesus tells him, “Follow Me,” Peter turns around, points at John, and asks, “Lord, what about this man?” (John 21:21).

It is the spiritual equivalent of siblings bickering about who gets the biggest dessert slice.

Paul reminds us in his letter to the Galatians what really matters:

“For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ.” — Galatians 1:10

Right after God speaks, the enemy will attempt to get our focus on the comparison game instead of on God.

3. Comparison Confuses Calling

Jesus does not tell Peter that John will suffer less or more. He simply redirects him with “What’s it to you?,” John’s walk is not Peter’s walk, and his walk should be his concern.

Comparison muddies our direction because it turns our attention everywhere except toward Jesus. Paul tells us in Romans that we all have gifts that differ according to the grace given to us:

“Having gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let us use them…” — Romans 12:6a

We should joyfully praise the gifts God has bestowed on us, as well as those He has bestowed upon others. It’s what makes us the body of Christ—different functions, working together for the good. Discontent over our gifts or another’s gifts robs us of joy.

4. The Assignment Is Unique, but the Source Is the Same

Peter and John served differently. Their ministries looked nothing alike, but both were faithful and both bore fruit.

God does not clone callings; He handcrafts them. Everyone is an original 1 of 1.

“For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.” — Ephesians 2:10

Your ministry does not need to look like someone else’s to have significant value in God’s economy.

5. Why the Comparison Is a One-Way Street

Have you ever noticed that comparison rarely travels in two directions? We almost never compare ourselves to someone who has less. That would require gratitude, humility, and a little perspective—and honestly, those three things are not nearly as common as envy.

We tend to look at people who seem to have more money, more influence, more peace, more blessings, more opportunities, or the ever-popular “more put-together life.” We scroll past someone’s new house, new job, new ministry, new vacation, or new whatever, and suddenly our perfectly fine life feels like leftovers.

Peter did the same thing. He didn’t look at a fisherman with fewer responsibilities and ask, “Lord, what about him?” No—he looked at the disciple Jesus loved. He compared himself upward.

But Scripture keeps redirecting us toward something different: gratitude, contentment, and a heart that values what God has placed in our hands.

“Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned, in whatever situation I am, to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need.” — Philippians 4:11–12

Comparison usually looks up to what we don’t have, but gratitude looks around at what God has already given.

And when we start practicing gratitude, something surprising happens. Suddenly the overlooked blessings look a lot bigger. The job we complain about becomes God’s gracious provision. The home we believe is too small or too dated becomes shelter. The season we thought was insignificant becomes God’s training ground.

6. Comparison Kills Momentum

Peter had a simple, clear direction: follow Jesus. But comparison stopped him before he could take a single step. Comparison pulls you out of mission mode and puts you into spectator mode.

And that makes us double-minded. James speaks to this:

“He is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.” — James 1:8

We cannot run the race and watch for lane violations at the same time. We stay in our lane and run the race God has put before us to win.

7. Jesus Calls You to Focus Forward (Not Sideways at Others)

Jesus does not explain John’s future. He does not soften the answer. He simply reminds Peter of his call and returns his focus to obedience.

There are countless examples in Scripture of our calling:

“You follow Me.” — John 21:22

“Then Jesus told his disciples, ‘If anyone would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.’” — Matthew 16:24

In Micah, we get more detail:

“He has told you, O man, what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justice, and to love kindness, and to walk humbly with your God?” — Micah 6:8

Obedience is our responsibility. Another’s calling is not your concern.

Keep Your Eyes on Him

When Peter asked about John, Jesus was not dismissing him. He was freeing him—freeing him from unnecessary mental noise, from distraction, from insecurity, and from the burden of evaluating someone else’s path.

And Jesus offers us the same freedom.

So, the next time the comparison itch hits…
the next time someone else’s journey looks more impressive…
the next time you hear yourself asking, “But Lord, what about them?”
Hear Jesus whispering with clarity and love:

“What’s it to you? You follow Me.”

Now lift your eyes, steady your heart, and follow Him forward.

Share this post with someone who needs this encouragement today.

To my brothers and sisters in Christ, have a Happy Thanksgiving. We have received a Kingdom that cannot be shaken; let us be grateful and offer God appropriate worship with Reverence and Awe!

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